Follow Your Heart. Listen to Your Own Voice.

Seriously. Tons of people are going to be flinging advice - wanted or not - your way. They mean well and whatever, but I realized that it clouded my own thoughts and confused me more than anything. It weighed me down and made me feel suffocated. One piece of advice that makes my blood boil is when people say "you should do things for you, now" and "now, you should take time to find yourself." Exsqueeze me, but you're assuming that I didn't do this while I was in a relationship. 

Not to gloat about my successes in life, but I graduated from college twice and started grad school while in a relationship. I also went out of the country without my significant other twice while in a relationship. Granted, there are things that I didn't do that I do now, such as spend more time connecting with friends and family, but it's slightly insulting (and possibly implicitly sexist?) when people assume I didn't do this when I was in a relationship. 

I admit that there were times when I lost myself in my relationships, but that was a long time ago, and I know who I am now. I'm never going to sacrifice that for a relationship. At this point, I don't think it's a good idea for me to get into another relationship, but that is something that I need to decide for myself. I don't need other people telling me what they think I should do with my love life.

This is the advice that I need, and usually have to tell myself: listen to your own voice, and follow your heart. Trust your mind, body, and soul to lead you where you should go, and just live your life how you want to (assuming you don't interfere with anyone else's life)! Sometimes, you just need to tune people out and listen to yourself. 

That's not to say that I haven't received good advice because I have received what my professor likes to call "nuggets of wisdom" from people and have added them to my inner-voice, but not every piece of advice is useful, helpful, or kind, even. Some people just think they know everything and assume your story is the same as theirs. It's not. No one story is ever the same, so follow the language of your own metaphorical life-novel. This applies to more than just relationships too. 

I think, at the end of the day, the opinion that matters the most about my own life is my own because I have to live with the choices that I make. But do know, when your Aunt Edna gives you unsolicited advice that wreaks of "the good ol' days," know she probably means well. I guess you could say "thanks, Aunt Edna, but imma do me." Leave her really confused with your young people lingo.